Missing My Creativity

Before Kiernan entered our lives, I was a creative, crafty sort of person. After he arrived, I expected to give up some of the things I did. Well now the reality of that has hit home.

Yes, I miss the time I once had to do crafty things. It was my outlet. My way to make everything right with the world again. It seems those days have been left behind.

I miss the quilting, the cross-stitching, the general crafty ideas and items. I think often of ways to work it into the day, but honestly, where does it fit into the schedule? During Kiernan's naptime? On weekends? After he goes to bed?

All fine ideas. Yet each of those times comes and goes and I find myself doing other things that I feel need my attention more. Cleaning, laundry, bill paying, Christmas cards, email, blogging. Sure, I know some of these things can wait, and yet there is only so much time to get certain things done. Others such as cleaning for example, if I put it off it drives me quite insane. I will eventually feel like a slob living in my own filth. Although I am certain it is really nowhere near as bad as I elude myself into thinking it is.

I love Kiernan with all my heart, but I really do miss having an open weekend to do as I please and not have to entertain a toddler. A bit selfish of me I think, and yet there it is. Out in the open for all to read. How do other mom's do it? How does one achieve a perfect balance in life between motherhood, work, housework, and me time?

I have so many ideas for crafty things I would like to do. I have quilts and fabric for them coming out my ears, yet no time to put them together. I would like to create a custom scrapbook kind of thing for Kiernan, and yet I have had little time to do so much as research who has layouts I like, ease of use and cost going for them on their sites.

I have managed to find time to read at least one book per month, to take long bubbly baths again (with the occasional "hi mommy" interruption), and to get out each weekend alone if only for a couple of hours and a run to the store. It is more for sanity than anything. To collect my thoughts and gather my wits.

Beosig doesn't know how well he has it made with his Saturday game nights. The more I think about it, the more I think I am jealous. Where is my Saturday game night?